ID: Dom Casual aka Tony Puma

TITLE: Mr. T's Commandment 45
ARTIST: Mr. T
LABEL: Columbia 1984

This is easily one of the strangest records I've ever heard. It's from an album worth of Mr. T rapping the most wholesome stuff he can conjure up- "Honor your mother and father/the bible makes it clear/ but if you don't want to, i pity the fool/ you'll have Mr. T to fear!" Brutal on the ears, but we all know the "so bad it's good" genre. This joint is for everyone who remembers Mr T's nasty cereal and when A-Team episodes were new.

TITLE: King Tim III (Personality Jock) 45
ARTIST: Fatback
LABEL: Spring 1979

Since rap 45's have become so popular overnight, here's the first recorded hip hop track on 45. It's the b-side to "You're My Candy Sweet" by Fatback and it makes the Sugarhill Gang sound like The Lox covering MC Hammer. Again, when someone tells you 'old rap' is Native Tongues, they're sleeping on the really early, pre-Run DMC joints. No, I'm not 30 years old- I just dig some old records. Some of the best rap shit came out crazy early.

TITLE: Slaughter / Sweet Sweetback/ Together Brothers
ARTIST: James Brown / Melvin Van Peebles / Barry White
LABEL: Polydor 1973 / (label - ?) 1971 / 20th Century 1974

So older people look at you funny when you tell 'em you still buy records? The way to really confuse them is to start a 8-track collection. Here's the soundtracks to "Slaughter's Big Ripoff", "Sweet Sweetback's Baadassss Song" and "Together Brothers." I actually stumbled over each one of these at different times, and I ask you, how do you NOT buy Sweetback if you find it? The funny thing is, 90% of what came out on 8-track was complete garbage. No, I don't have an 8-track player at the moment, but these are mostly for the artwork.

TITLE: Soca Breakdance 45
ARTIST: The Pincher
LABEL: Watapana (Aruba NV) 1985

I've got a big thing for old electro and b-boying, especially the cheesy compilations that tired to get a piece of the "Beat Street" audience. For some reason, a bunch of soca and calypso artists in the 80's decided to jump on the bandwagon and release weird tracks all about breaking. Comedy. I think the Rocksteady even went on a Caribbean tour once. This gets filed next to records like "Kung Fu Freak From Kung Fu Creek" and "Yakety Moog."

TITLE: Cat Woman 45
ARTIST: Abaco Dream
LABEL: A&M 197?

I've never met anyone who knows about this b-side to "Life And Death In G&A", it's some weird Sly Stone project that sounds NOTHING like the Family Stone. Instead it's this relentlessly spacy funk track with hushed vocals saying things like, "who's in my garden eating herringbones?" Crazy thick bass/organ throbbing fuzz that's pretty psychedelic. It's got a sort of European sound to it kind of like Titanic, but it's crazy funky and unusual- two great tastes...

TITLE: Man of Motion 45
ARTIST: Lowell Fulsom
LABEL: Jewel 196?

Takes my time before I move, everything I do- I always do it with a groove." No it's not "Tramp" (we all know what that sounds like), but it remains a slept-on rugged funky blues track by one of the masters. This is one of my favorites that somehow sounds better each time. Scope the misspelling of Lowell's name on the label- doesn't that just make you feel all warm and tingly? Reggae fans know what's up.

TITLE: Superfly Meets Shaft 45
ARTIST: John + Ernest
LABEL: Rainy Wednesday 197?

If anyone is familiar with Dickie Goodman, they probably already know this. No doubt some cats find this and expect some new funk 45 they can hock on Ebay. Ha-ha. Goodman was a guy who made novelty records by chopping up popular tracks of the day and inserting them, call-and-response style, into goofy skits. This was the one that catered to the Black/soul community. It's funny, especially the "freddy's dead?" part. This never failed to get some people calling up when I played this on the radio. The b-side of this copy has an inexplicable early edit of "Superfly" being looped into oblivion.

TITLE: Holiday Rap 45
ARTIST: MC Miker "G" + DJ Sven
LABEL: Dureco (Holland) 1986

A curiosity that some people might still remember. Years before Europe had a hip-hop scene worth noting stateside, this was an international hit. Based on Madonna's "Holiday" (compare to Jeckyl & Hyde's "Genius Rap" or Spyder D's "Just Can't Wait") these two guys from Holland made this, one of the GOOFIEST rap tracks of all time. "We are going on a summer holiday, if you want to go with Sven, we're going to London and New York City and we'll take a little piece of Amsterdam- rrrright!" Worth it if only for the look of crazed recogniton on people's faces.

TITLE: Am I Black Enough for You? 45
ARTIST: Billy Paul
LABEL: Philly Int. (Jamaica WI) 45

One of Billy Paul's best tracks, used to nice effect by Schooly D. Billy really lets the voice belt out the chorus on this rouser, which bears a similiarity to "Brothers Gonna Work It Out" now that I think about it. And how can you not love the Record Specialists pressing/sleeve from Kingston? Just in case you need any 70's soul 45s with blurry screen printing and offset labels. Ahhhhh, Jamaica.

TITLE: Edison 45
ARTIST: Dutch,Rhythm,Steel & Show Band
LABEL: Negram (Holland) 197?

You just gotta give it up for 45s with cats like these on the picture sleeves. Even if they're some Dutch knuckleheads who dressed like that until 1981. Even if they write corny tracks about the invention of the gramaphone. I think too many heads are only checking for the art in the grooves. Man! Look at them- talk about 'got it goin' on!